Why

Why's and becauses have to go together. As to why I'm blogging this? I don't have a friend who, I think, could understand me. I think I'm underestimating them. I think they'll understand but I'm just ashamed to tell them. All because I know that this is wrong.

Coming from a conservative and strictly Catholic family makes me feel that I'm the evilest devil one could meet. I've been an acolyte when I was a kid, and almost entered the seminary. And here I am, with a weak flesh.

I could remember that I used to sneak my mom's money when I was a kid. I could ask it from her but I know "Masama ang bawal." I also tried smoking alone, testing how dried scallions as a cigarette would taste, or just rolled newspaper, coupon bond or stationery. I keep on experimenting things. And when I am done with it, I just put it to a full stop.

I just hope that this madness will end... soon before I'll be tied to eternity with the woman I love. We've never had sex, nor kissed. We chose to be physically pure prior to the wedding.